Wine Appreciation

A little something I wrote in 2003 that I thought I'd share...


Wine Appreciation: Sex or Stamp Collecting?

One of the best things about the academic study of food and wine is that you have final exams with questions like this! Granted, having an instructor with a great sense of humor, and an even greater passion for his subject matter, helps immensely.

Many were surprised when this question was met with indignant retorts from an unexpected number of stamp collectors in the group, quick to defend their often-maligned pastime.

Wine, like stamps, is often collected for investment as well as for hobby. We may envision a wine collector as a wealthy, older man in a smoking jacket visiting his precious collection in its dimly lit, cold, damp cellar – stacks of bottles covered in dust and cobwebs. This same person may also have a rare stamp collection kept in equally appropriate conditions and valued similarly, as an accomplishment – a conquest fulfilled.

Wine may deserve the esteem of the collector, but it is still, in the end, an agricultural product – food. To truly appreciate wine, it must be consumed. So, to answer the question… it’s definitely about sex.

Wine is pursued. It is painstakingly selected based on reputation, physical appearance (color, labeling, etc.), and its ability to enhance the sensual experience of the pursuer. The chosen wine is considered to have a direct reflection on the good taste and social status of the chooser. Many believe that showing up at a party with the wrong wine will ruin their reputation. There are numerous publications dedicated to helping the average person make informed choices about selecting the “right” wine.

Once selected, wine is handled with great care and reverence. The bottle is held, just so. It is gently laid on its side with great sensitivity to the temperature and lighting of the surroundings. When the right moment arrives for it to be opened, there is great ceremony in its presentation.

Wine requires special tools. True wine hedonists have definite opinions on the best type of opener to use. Most of them have a personal favorite that feels just right in their hand and makes the job of opening the bottle a simpler and more pleasurable experience.

The vessel from which the wine is consumed varies from functional to highly specialized, designed explicitly to enhance the sensual experience of enjoying specific types of wine. Some of the best are simple, unadorned lead crystal that allow the wine’s own vibrant color to shine. For those who need a little extra visual stimulation, there are wine glasses in a vast array of shapes, colors, sizes, and ornamented themes.

Part of what makes wine so sexy is the ritual of its consumption. It can’t, or at least shouldn’t be, rushed. Once the bottle is open and poured with a flourish into the preferred glassware, the sensual dance begins.

It all starts with a lingering glance, and maybe, if it’s a special wine, a reverential stare.

Breathe in. Consider the aroma; allow it to stimulate memories and fantasies. Aficionados may spend long, lusty moments here describing, in great detail, the developing complexity for the wines essence.

Finally, sip. At first you may approach the wine gently, even hesitantly. How does it make you feel? Describe the texture, the flavor, the sensation it leaves on your tongue. Relax; feel the tension slowly drain from your body. Take a moment to enjoy the convivial setting, the pleasure of sharing this experience with others. Different people will experience different sensations. Take this opportunity to discover more about those around you. Savor each moment.

When the bottle is spent and each glass has been emptied, the evening draws to a close. With a slightly heavy head and a light heart, sleep deeply and well. Reminisce about this encounter, dream about the next special bottle.

This is definitely not stamp collecting.